I had a smart meter installed on Monday and I've been paralysed ever since.

In case it's called something different outside of the UK a smart meter comes with a screen you're supposed to be able to see that tells you in real time what your electricity and gas consumption are, the kw, the cost. It comes with green, amber and red lights that just turn themselves on when you do stuff that consumed more energy such as boiling a kellte or turning on the hot water.

Even if I'm not the person that organised the bills in the house and my spouse assures me we are ok, the simple fact those lights turn on pushed me in a state of freeze.

It's like I have this part inside of me that keeps going "if we can't do things how they are supposed to be then we're not doing them at all!" Which is ridiculous, it's like being internally held hostage buly a five year old, I know, but I don't know how to reason with it?

Yesterday trying to explain it to my spouse I had a full blow meltdown and everything I can think of doing gets stuck in it's tracks because it somehow involves doing things that I'm terrified will turn on the "bad" lights.

For instance, yesterday I couldn't have a cup of tea, not even if my spouse made it, it's like it was short circuiting my brain...

I can only imagine this is my autism reaction to have new information that disrupt in a way my daily routines and responses. Is there anything that threw a wrench in your daily stuff suddenly and did you manage beyond the weeks it takes to push through to create new ones while I basically can't even feed myself?