I don’t know where to go from here.

Hi. This is a throw away because both my partner and I have Reddit.

I emotionally cheated on my partner close to 2 years ago for about a year with one person. BP revenge cheated which we agreed upon, but they promised a month ago they stopped and that we were going to actually try to fix our relationship. Today I found out from a close friend that BP is active on tinder and matched with their cousin. Apparently BP reacts and likes and messages a lot of sexually explicit people on instagram and Snapchat. They sent the evidence. Just not the tinder messages. I don't want to see them. I don’t know what to do. They doesn’t know I know.

Obviously what I did was wrong I know this. I am in therapy and I have been actively working on my lifestyle and habits to change and to be better for my family. (We have 2 small children)

I just don't know how to move forward. I don't know how to bring it up with them

For context, Originally I gave a hall pass but BP couldn’t find anyone willing to physically cheat.

So we agreed that BP could follow who BP wanted message them whatever. Then because we live in a small town, it would get back to me at work, my work colleagues found out, my friends found out, I became the laughing topic at work and a lot of my friends didn’t really understand the situation. I asked BP if we could change it to people not in our town because word was getting back to me, screenshots where getting back to me and I couldn’t focus on my work. BP didnt and a few months later I ended up leaving my job because it got too much. BP promised they would unfollow specific people because they were either way to close to my friend group or we ran in to them a lot. Come to find out BP never actually unfollowed them, never stopped contacting them like we promised.

I have begged for MC but BP doesn’t think they need the help and that it’s not helpful to them. IC for BP is out the window as well. I have begged for months. I’ve made appointments only to be the only one to show up. Maybe at this point I am a little delusional. I don’t know.